Most dads love their children and want to do good things for them. Adding elements that enhance, add value and life quality to present and future. Sometimes, though, dads get caught up in the cultural trends of transferring father to child value through stuff, money and unbridled, unrestricted freedom and granting adult privileges to hormoned enraged kids. Good dads must choose the road lesser traveled these days. Yep. It’s hard work.
Subcultures our kids live in day by day screams at them on every level, with variable concentrations of peer pressure, identity-crushing expectations and then to present themselves a certain way, in a particular fashion to the kings and queens of their mini-universes, as it were. They must wear specific styles and brands along with accompanying gear. While simoultaneouly declaring freedom from parental guidance, loving restrictions and most certainly, schedule requirements and responsibilities. Needless to say, the deck is stacked against us from the cultural giants our kids, and we face today. What do we do to combat these giants?
We create great kids by the words we speak to, over and about our children (WORDS SPOKEN BY GOOD FATHERS) What we say to our children is just as important as what we do for them and to them. Yep, there isn’t doubt at all. The father hunger in our children requires words and deeds for the filling. Our words of hope, direction, leadership, and discipline that have the far more significant effect than do the words and actions minions of culture, media, peer groups, teachers, and coaches.
Fathers create and influence identity, input core values, build character traits and determine our children’s destinies to a very great extent. In fact, and this is the biggie, earthly fathers represent the Father in Heaven. We are the direct representation of Father, Abba, Papa, Daddy – Heavenly Father. Yes, Yes we are, and for sure, that is what we were designed for originally from the beginning.
What we do to our children matters with an enormous weight and impact. Heres why. We are the Heavenly Father’s earthly reflection to our children, regardless of their knowledge or understanding. So, then we determine how they respond to Heavenly Father and the type of relationship they have with Him. Conversion to being a “Daddy’s boy” is now our part to lean into with God (Jehovah) and then transfer and impact to our children. That is our call and direction we must live out each day. We are ever transforming daily into the father they deserve and cry out for with everything that is within them, father hunger.
The 5 great things to do to your kids
- Call them closer to you. No requirements or restrictions, inviting them just as they are, like it or not, call them to come. Be a person and place of peace and patience. Non-threatening, but firm. Consistent, kind, not overbearing. Above all, unconditional love applied to everyone and everything. These elements open the hearts of children confirming you are a safe place where they may be themselves. In every child lies a prodigal. Loving the prodigal before he or she leaves to explore the world aligns a child’s heart with the love of the heavenly Father.
- Look them in the eye every chance you get. Read the souls of your babies. Don’t be fearful of what you see. Don’t overreact by what you sense. Father in Heaven gives wisdom and knowledge to His sons and daughters freely and purposefully. Love penetrates souls, draws hearts to it and keeps them coming back for more.
- Investigate their lives. Engage by listening, learning about the rhythms of the kids’ lives. Invite them to have open communication lines with you. Open communication is far better than hidden deeds of darkness. You know, like the ones you were involved in. Loving challenge is best served following an invitation accepted.
- Speak over them. What we speak over our children, negative or positive, takes root. Words are seeds. Your babies’ souls are fields that grow what is sown in them. The culture sows poisonous, barren weeds that overtake and destroy the areas of their lives. Seeds go into the ground and die, root and then produce a harvest. Speak Father’s words over them in conversation and prayer loving all the way.
- Impart identity, purpose, sonship. Tell your children the story of what you see developing in their lives. Children are created with a natural bent, for example, musicians, athletes, dancers, leadership. It is information that comes to dads from your Heavenly Father to you as His representative. Our children’s identity is wired in by the original design order of the Creator. Our influence in the identity formation and confirmation of our children is a dominant force with immeasurable impact. God (Jehovah) is a wisdom giver.